Ten Fingers and Ten Toes (Installment 6)

“Harper,” he called through the door. I sat on my knees in a movie house bathroom. Number one, it was gross, nuber two, it was ill timed. It was all I could do to keep from passing out. Nothing like having your date being sick, in my case pregnant, especially a first. Ok, deep breath, in, out, in, out, it will pass. It always does. At least that was what I want to believe. The feeling of impending darkness was telling me different. What am I going to do? If I stand up I will surely pass out. I can’t stay here that’s for sure. Ok, up one leg at a time. Breath. The the warmth dropped from face to my feet. That’s not good. Wiping my face with a cold towel I held to the sink in an attempt to regain some dignity. All I can do is salvage.

“Harper,” Andrew calls through the door as he knocks . “You ok?”

“I’ll be right there,” I choke out. If I can make it just two seconds. Just two seconds, I’ll be in his arms and it will be enough to hold me up till I can sit down. One step at a time. One breath at a time. I can do this. This is simple compared to what is coming. Opening the door I found him leaning against the frame. The look of unease was unmistakable. His forehead creased and drew his brows together. “You ok, you left out of the theater so quick. You look so pale. You did this at my parents, are you sick?”

Pushing a strand of hair behind my ear I answered after considering what I would say. “A, yeah, I’m fine. Can we just leave? I need some air.” His questioning look remained, and he was right in it. I wasn’t good at hiding anything. I wasn’t doing well now. Lies were not something I was skilled at. Taking his hand, I wrapped his arm around my waist to assist me. He obliged me and I leaned against him as if we were intimate and not because he was my stability. The strange thing is, I could get used to his arms around me. It had a easiness to it. Getting my ex to hold me was more like pulling teeth. He did it but it was something pleasuable. As I look back on it, there was nothing he was interested in unless it was him.

Andrew walked me to his car. I watched his body flex as he walked around the hood of his care and positioned himself in the drivers side. Belting himself in he hesitated then looked over at me. I felt the heat of it. There wasn’t going to be any talking him out of this. He wanted to know and I was going to have to acknowledge I had made a mistake. The baby was not the mistake; the mistake was getting mixed up with Theodore. I’m sure all that Andrew could see was getting mixed up with a woman that had a ready-made family for him. Okay this was it my first date with him and the last. Didn’t think it was going to happen that quickly. As hard as I tried I couldn’t look at him, my heart raced my hands became sweaty and I thought for sure I was going to pass out where I sat. Of course that came along with pregnancy too and not necessarily the situation I found myself in.

He leaned against the steering wheel and put his arm along the back of the seat. He was just waiting on me I could tell, but I just couldn’t do it. “You know I get it, you’re just not attracted to me, and that’s all right. I took a long shot. It’s not your fault.”

Turning in my seat I started to enlighten him. Oh boy was this going to be a shock. No man should hear from woman he just started dating I’m pregnant with another mans baby. “No, you don’t understand, there are some things that, I don’t know, just how to put it into words.” His expression was blank leaving me nervous. I don’t know what he expected me to say. Well, yes I do. He thinks I have no feelings for him, that there is no chemistry between the two of us. Is he ever wrong. Leaning in I kissed him before he could say another word. Being able to kiss him believe how good it felt good and it was better when he kissed me back. My arms locked around his neck holding him there. His large masculine hand cradled the back of my head as he slipped an arm around my waist pulling me closer. He kissed me just behind my ear and down the curve of my neck until it became damp. His breath against it sent chills up my spine. “I’ve been waiting on this all night.”

I sighed as if I had been running for hours. “Me too,”. That was more than what I wanted him to know. Ok, I have myself in a bigger mess than I can get out of. Theodore Late is off fooling with whom ever he chooses and I am with a man that has no idea I am pregnant with said cheater. This isn’t going to end well I can feel it.

#baby #children #lastresort #struggles #adoption #Decision #sacrafice #love #loss #life